ESSAY, FOR DISCUSSION, READ AT A
MEETING OF THE HISTORICAL AND ANTIQUARIAN CLUB OF HARTFORD, AND OFFERED FOR
THE THIRTY-DOLLAR PRIZE.[*]
[*] Did not take the prize.
Observe, I do not mean to suggest
that the custom of lying has suffered any decay or interruption--no, for
the Lie, as a Virtue, A Principle, is eternal; the Lie, as a recreation, a
solace, a refuge in time of need, the fourth Grace, the tenth Muse, man's
best and surest friend, is immortal, and cannot perish from the earth while
this club remains. My complaint simply concerns the decay of the art of
lying. No high-minded man, no man of right feeling, can contemplate the
lumbering and slovenly lying of the present day without grieving to see a
noble art so prostituted. In this veteran presence I naturally enter upon
this theme with diffidence; it is like an old maid trying to teach nursery
matters to the mothers in Israel. It would not become to me to criticise
you, gentlemen--who are nearly all my elders--and my superiors, in this
thing--if I should here and there seem to do it, I trust it will in most
cases be more in a spirit of admiration than fault-finding; indeed if this
finest of the fine arts had everywhere received the attention, the
encouragement, and conscientious practice and development which this club
has devoted to it, I should not need to utter this lament, or shred a single
tear. I do not say this to flatter: I say it in a spirit of just and
appreciative recognition. [It had been my intention, at this point, to
mention names and to give illustrative specimens, but indications observable
about me admonished me to beware of the particulars and confine myself to
generalities.]
No fact is more firmly established
than that lying is a necessity of our circumstances--the deduction that it
is then a Virtue goes without saying. No virtue can reach its highest
usefulness without careful and diligent cultivation--therefore, it goes
without saying that this one ought to be taught in the public schools--even
in the newspapers. What chance has the ignorant uncultivated liar against
the educated expert? What chance have I against Mr. Per--against a lawyer?
Judicious lying is what the world needs. I sometimes think it were even
better and safer not to lie at all than to lie injudiciously. An awkward,
unscientific lie is often as ineffectual as the truth.
